Daily life...

Where do I start?
I am stressed daily...hourly...by the minute...
Being bipolar doesn't help.
Being dreadfully hot doesn't either.
My son is being evaluated on Monday for autism.
I cannot say that I am not worried,
but just searching for answers.
My dear hubby is away.
Working in another town
and only home a couple days a week.
Where do I continue?
If my son isn't dumping cheerios on the living room floor...
or minutes later dumping sugar on the kitchen floor...
Cartoons always on.
No time for one self,
until late at night...
when my serenity kicks in.
I have been quoting that serenity prayer as of late
"God...
Please grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change.
The strength the change the things I can.
And the wisdom to know the difference"
It is so true!
Some days I get so fed up that I cannot stand it.
So to know that I can only change so many things makes me hopeful.
I want to rip out my hair,
but that will only make me bald.
Not change any problems...
They will still be there and I will be hairless!
I am so disgusted today.
Yet, I have got to keep on keeping on.
I have days where I am sad,
so much so that it is hard to get out of bed.
Yet, I have days that are so flighty
that I have no clue what's really going on.
Or just excessive energy...I like those days:)
My friends keep me sane.
Have them be a phone call or an instant message away.
I feel proud to be alive.
I do not know if I didn't have the strength
that I did and do have...
would I have made it.
I always say winters are hard.
Because there is no where to go.
Yet, summers are too hot to go anywhere as well.
Guess that's why I enjoy spring and fall.
Random rambles...
yet I feel better as I write.
Life will get better.
One day at a time.
That's all we have to take.
Minute by minute...second by second.
Just keep going...
and don't give up.
I have to....